Steve's Story

Steve was born in 1984 and throughout his youth involved in sports. He played for Hulmeville Soccer, Continental Baseball, Penndel Wildcats Football. He loved playing sports and having fun. The moment Steve walked into a room it brightened everyone's face; he always had a hug, a kiss, or a handshake for you along with a joke or something funny that he just had to share.

Steve graduated from Central Bucks High School East and attended Bucks County Community College and Bloomsburg University. He was struggling in school and we knew something was not right, but did not act on our intuition.

In 2004 we learned that he had a problem that would be the biggest thing he ever had to face - Steve was addicted to prescription drugs. His drug use began in his freshman year of high school beginning with Marijuana, it then moved to prescription drugs like oxycontin and vicodin. The drug use progressed within three years to inhaling heroin and ended with intravenous heroin use. Between April 2004 and February 2008, he was in and out of treatment centers. Beginning with local treatment centers, and progressing to out of state treatment facilities.

Like most families, our first reaction to his drug use was "just stop". It was not until we educated ourselves on addiction that we realized stopping was not an option - Steve had a disease that was going to progress; and other than treatment centers there were not a lot of alternatives for us to seek.

Treatment helped for a period of time, however, we were not prepared for the continued relapses that would take place. In 2007 Steve was clean for five months - we were grateful to have him back in our lives. With the support of a large and incredible family, and friends, he was on track. He was living on his own, and working as many hours as he could get from his job at Red Lobster as a waiter, and attending NA meetings.

In November 2007, Steve relapsed and was again using heroin intravenously. The naltrexone pellet which was scheduled to be replaced in early December failed to block the opiates. He entered treatment again on January 8, 2008. He was in inpatient treatment for six weeks, came out of treatment and two weeks later on February 11, 2008, we found him dead in his apartment after shooting heroin.

Our experience with the death of our son is not unlike millions of families who have watched the suffering and progression of the disease. We are one of the few, however, who have been very open in expressing Steve's battle with this disease through to his death. We have been on the receiving end of intolerance and the stigma associated with addiction, all of which stem from the lack of awareness and the general ignorance of addiction within the public.

While I see the tremendous effort being made towards the education of drugs, there appears to be a lack of information related to addiction as a disease. Educating teens and parents on the disease of addiction must be expanded. Educators and school administrators appear to work hard to keep the school drug problems silent so they do not alarm parents or ruin the school reputation in the community.

On behalf of parents across this nation who like me are driving from soccer field to ball field and are loving and cherishing every minute of their child's youth we must find a way to communicate that their lives can change on a dime. They need to understand that like other diseases, this disease can strike their children suddenly, sometimes without warning. Once it does, it will have a lasting and profound effect on the entire family as it progresses through each of its stages.

We have established a foundation in our son's name, The Steven Arthur Day Foundation - Hope for Addiction. Our mission is to broaden the education and awareness of this disease and its profound and long term effect on our children.

Our goal is to fund scientific research studies of addition that will allow us to expand our knowledge of addiction and discover a cure.

Living through this experience has taught me to live every moment with your children like it may be your last. Addiction is a disease of the brain that takes our child's innocence away quickly and permanently. As parents we are usually aware that something is just not right, but do not act on instinct. Maybe it's because we are afraid of what we might find. I knew Steve was sleeping more than I thought he should, and he did not do well in college. When I noticed strange behavior and questioned it he always had an excuse that seemed very logical. I learned later that addicts are very good liars.

As a parent, don't hesitate to react when you see a change in your child. Seek out resources that are available some of which are provided on our site. We certainly do not have the answers; we are not experts - just a group of Moms, Dads, and family members and friends who have learned from living with child addicts and now struggle after the death of our child addicts.